Go to your room ...

Do not pass go.

Do not collect 200 dollars or a juice box from the fridge.

Do you need to go potty?  Don't lie to me.  Do you need to go.  Go potty, then go in your room.  Do not come out of your room until I come get you.

Do you need a diaper?  Are you wet?  Did you poop?  Go to your room.  (F&$%, this is when I realize that Charlie still sleeps in a crib and I have to lift him into this crib.)  Here's a book.  I'm not happy with you, Charlie.

Max go to your room.  Do not come out.  Here's a book.  Take a rest.  I'm not happy with you, Max.

Now, that I am in my basement, let me tell you what has happened.  I have discovered my children's monster identities.  The Tazmanian Devil, Chip and Dale, Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum, and Veruca Salt, Nellie Olsen, and Randy from "A Christmas Story" all rolled up together in two magnificent packages. I was going to pull my hair out ... before they actually did.

Max
Max whines.
Max stands at the top of the staircase whining and pleading to be picked up BECAUSE he doesn't want to walk down the stairs.
Max will push Charlie out of the way so he can get to me and be closer to me.  Physically closer.
Max believes the answer to everything is NO.  Just ... NO.

Charlie
Charlie screams ... whenever he wants.  6:13am as we wake up ... he screams.
He hits.  "nice touches Charlie."  Hits.
He wants the car keys.
He wants to turn the car on.
He doesn't want to get in his car seat.
He will kick, push, scream, thrash about, holler, cry, bend, twist, launch himself across the car to get out of his car seat.

So ... today I had it and they knew it.  And I blessedly had almost an hour to myself.  And for the rest of the day, all I had to say was "room" and they stopped.

They are slowly growing up, hopefully sooner than later when it comes to their maturity(for their age ofcourse).  But my little men are still my little men.  If I ever want to snuggle up to Max in bed, he won't kick me out.  If Charlie wants to wrestle on the floor, I'll always let him win.  I still struggle to be the tough mum, yet laying down the the law today felt pretty damn good.